Friday, 9 October 2009

Anniversary



Its been one year since my first post here.

I can't remember who i used to be. Does that mean I haven't changed? To be honest, my thoughts haven't changed. I still think the same, only now there is a darker (*halo flutters uncertainly*) edge to my thoughts.
My personality is different to my thoughts. I used to show off. I used to not care about anything beyond what mattered to me. And i used to have one bad sulking tantrum after the other...
Now I'm suprisingly calm. I seem to subconsciously take out my anger on ripping paper into shreds. (its a vast improvement to my previous breaking things habit..)

This blog and the people i have met throught it has changed me in so many ways, its almost unbelievable.
I started as a 17 year old, whose main purpose in life seemed to be to finish all the school work, and read. It was supposed to be a diary, which i can re read and laugh at, if i ever got bored.
Instead, I ended up with a different perspective on almost everything.

I, as well as almost everyone who knows me, will realise i think too much.Maybe i'll change that some time soon...or maybe not, i'll decide later.

"The world is a comedy to those that think; a tragedy to those that feel".

It seems horrible to either live by thoughts or emotions. I do occasionally worry that one day i'll retreat into my thoughts, but i'm far too talkative for that to actually happen. ;)
I wonder why I manage to laugh so much these days, when I've come to the realisation that my life is a mess. Perhaps i love Messes.

I want to say I have the same ambitions and dreams that i used to, but i've become a lot more realistic;( my dreams as a little girl were to bring world peace and harmony...thankfully life isn't that simple).
My main ambition now is to be happy and bring happiness to the people around me, (although i warn you not to mistake me for being generous..i just don't like hearing people complain :P).

My thoughts before were always so mundane and boring. Seriously, had you been in my head a year ago, you would have tried to scratch your way out of my skull. The only interesting thing i thought about, was what if i had chosen to lead a traditional simple iraqi life. It would have been so simple to live each day as it came.
Now I feel like i'm drowining in knowledge. I know so much more about life and people now, that i sometimes just sit and giggle with glee over this, ( i don't really. honestly i don't..)

Ok, I don't think i've changed supremely since last year. My writing seems to have taken a more depressing voice sometimes, but personally i'm just proud i haven't given up.

Oh oh, I also won best post for September 2009, from Iraq blog updates. :D
*bows amongst the deafening roars and thundering claps*

And my other achievement...I managed to write this before it became 10th of October....oweee my fingers hurt, i rushed it in five minutes because i got caught up watching a film. :(

(and talking of achievements, Iraq won 3 medals in the Pan Arab sports league thing. :D)

oh and thanks to everyone. And special thanks to some ;) you know who you are. hehehe
(i'm kidding, special thanks to all...)

19 comments:

programmer craig said...

My main ambition now is to be happy and bring happiness to the people around me...

That's a really good one! For people who can manage to pull that off, the rest of the good things in life seem to just come to them effortlessly.

Happy Blog Anniversary :)

Michomeme said...

Happy Blog Anniversary Touta..Mabrouk for the best post award of the month you deserve it.

Anonymous said...

hi touta
happy anniverasry :) :)

spinspermy said...

"My main ambition now is to be happy and bring happiness to the people around me, (although i warn you not to mistake me for being generous..i just don't like hearing people complain :P)."

Are you a drug dealer?!! part time blogger?

spinspermy said...

oh..wait, happy blog anniversary ;)

Melantrys said...

Happy birthday to you, happy birthday to you, happy birthday, dear blo-hog, happy birthday to you!

programmer craig said...

Germans sing "Happy Birthday" American style!? I didn't know that! I hope you used an American accent at least!

Touta said...

programmer craig,
thanks. :D even if i don't pull it off, i can always pretend i have..;) i don't think life would be fun if anything came easily though..

michomeme,
thank you, :) i hope to read more of your posts too micho!
keep us updated, and i hope you're enjoying the house. :D

anonymous,
thanks, i'm investigating who you are. :P

spinspermy,
drug dealer? h3h3h3, that would be a much easier way to make myself and others happy..thanks for the idea..;)

melantrys,
danke melantrys! i was going to write some more german, but i am trying to keep with the 'i dont show off anymore'. hehe

JG said...

Happy anniversary, Touta!

Hope you've enjoyed writing it as much as we've enjoyed reading it. ;)

///RhusLancia said...

Happy anniversary Touta! Thanks for sharing!

le roi de Suède n'a pas de prix Nobel de la paix. Öbama.

Jeffrey said...

Touta,

Yes, I have to admit that I wouldn't like to be forced to claw my way out of your skull. I'm satisfied with you yourself sending out regular reports from inside your own skull.

Boy, that seemed like much longer than one year.

*

البرجوازي العراقي said...

Your blog is added to list of
IRAQI BLOG INDEX
http://iraqiblogindex.blogspot.com
iraqiblogindex@gmail.com

Touta said...

JG,
aah, i bet you i enjoyed writing it more...i got to say as much as i want...:D
thanks

rhuslancia,
thanks. :) i'm too lazy to guess or google translate the french, but i'm guessing its to do with obama's lack of intervention in foreign affairs..

jeffrey,
hahaha, touche Jeffrey, touche.
it did seem longer than one year, because i was the blogger you have been waiting for over the years..*proudly puffs*

iraqi bourgeious,
thank you, will this blog index comment and analyse the blogs or just archive them? recently the iraqi blogosphere has lacked leadership in critiscing the opinions and thoughts.

Pandora said...

Congrats Touta. You have an awesome blog

///RhusLancia said...

mmm, actually it just says the king of Sweden has no Nobel Peace Prize. Long story. It's like a taunt from The Öbama over his award.

"recently the iraqi blogosphere has lacked leadership in critiscing the opinions and thoughts."

Jeffrey could always reopen IBC...


le roi de Suède n'a pas de prix Nobel de la paix. Öbama.

Touta said...

pandora,
thanks! nice to see you. :)

rhuslancia,
ah, the nobel peace price thing...Obama hasn't brought peace to anywhere yet, but i suppose patience is needed for everything.
i think since no one's critiscing the blogs anymore, there's less of a push for bloggers to write (or improve).

or maybe i just like being criticised/reading criticism :P

programmer craig said...

I could criticize you, Touta! I'm really good at that! Ask around, it's true!

البرجوازي العراقي said...

Hi, regarding your comment
"iraqi bourgeious,
thank you, will this blog index comment and analyse the blogs or just archive them? recently the iraqi blogosphere has lacked leadership in critiscing the opinions and thoughts"

The analysis is harder than just lising. What I wanna focus on now is to list all the Iraqi Blogs in a classified manner. On other hand I want this site to be giving the names of the last writings of those blogs. Therefore, it is more than a List of All the the Iraqi Blogs. It is

1. Comprehensive
2. Free
3. Classified
4. Contains the last update of the blogs.

Regarding analysis. I still like the one that KHALID do on his site. Anyway the IRAQI BLOG INDEX is

http://iraqiblogindex.blogspot.com

Touta said...

Programmer craig,
sadly enough i like hearing critiscm, so i can improve and get one step closer to being absolutley perfect. :P

bourgeious,
thanks for the clarification. :)